I feel the sadness
I feel the pain
How do you make them whole again?

I can’t do right for doing wrong
All I can do is try to be strong.

The days are just as dark as nights
Will I ever see a light?

I feel the pain
I take the blame
I bow my head in shame
Why couldn’t I see.  Why didn’t I see?

I feel so angry
I feel so mad
Why do people act so bad?

I wish I could be judge and jury
To let out all my fury.

A person I love is hurting dearly
I wish, I wish I could be judge and jury.

What was happening, I didn’t know
The shame I feel will never go.

Anonymous

Can we just be a family?

Will you always love me?
Will you take my side?
Will you take the pain away?
I tried so hard to hide.

Will you pack a lunch for me?
Sometimes hold my hand?
Can we just be ordinary?
Do you understand?

When I throw a tantrum,
Will you promise not to pack?
If I learn to you love you
Will you try to love me back?

Will we ever see the funny times?
Learn to laugh when times get tough?
Then we will be a family,
Because that will be enough.

By Sammy, age 9

The days my Children Spent Crying

There were days when my children were smiling
But now there’s plenty of days when they’re crying
Their daddy played secret games which left them hurt
He abused them, violated them, made them feel like dirt
My children’s innocence, stolen by their daddy’s perverted lust
He was supposed to support, love and protect them, now they struggle to trust.

There are some days when my children are still smiling
But still plenty of days when they are still crying
I feel I let my children down, I failed at keeping them safe
He was a ‘religious’ man, I failed to see the lies behind the faith

To think I actually loved him, makes me feel physically sick
Not knowing he was hurting my children, I must be so damn thick.

There are times now when my children are smiling
But other days they ‘remember’ and do a lot of crying
Through the nightmares, flashbacks and bedwetting, we’re slowly moving on

My children, so insecure, need a lot of love, they were hurt for too long
It would have been easier if their daddy had a ‘label’ big and clear!
BEWARE, DANGER, DON’T TRUST, POTENTIAL PAEDOPHILE HERE
My children are now safe and do plenty of smiling
But sadly, they will never forget the days that they spent crying.

Anonymous

Where were you?

Where were you when I needed you the most?
Where were you when I was hurting inside?
Where were you when I was making another scar on my arm?
Where were you?
I thought you would always be there.

Where were you when I needed to cry?
Where were you when I needed to hear everything was going to be alright?
Where were you when I needed you that day?
Where were you?
I thought you would always be there.

Where were you when I needed a friend?
Where were you when I felt there was no end?
Where were you when I was breaking in two?
Where were you?
I thought you would always be there.

You were never there when I needed you so much.
You always had something more important to do.
I faced all my problems on my own
I now know I didn’t need you at all
I’ve overcome everything life has thrown at me all on my own.

Emma

My Song

It seems like only yesterday I was reaching for the blade.

It seems like only yesterday I was reaching for the pills.

As I sit down and wonder why I’m like this, I have a flashback, it hurts so much but I just can’t seem to get the picture of him on top of me out of my head.

When I snap out of it I’m so upset I want to reach for the blade again.

A black cloud comes over me and I can see my life is full of darkness and pain.

The scars on the outside are now healing but the scars on the inside are still raw.

I sit and think to myself “why can’t I be happy?  I would do anything to be able to go out and have a good time”.

I’m walking.  I don’t know where, but I’m walking.
I get to what looks like a crossroad, I see that to the left is a bright shining light, and to the right is a dark, gloomy forest.

I wonder which one to pick as the light can always turn to darkness.

I take the chance and go left.

The light seems to be shining through and at last the scars on the inside are now healing.

Emma

Scared!

So ………. Scared.
I’m not scared of him
I’m scared of IT
What he does
What he is
Who he is
But I’m not scared of him
I’m not scared of him
Is it true what he says
Or is it lies
He brings pain in my eyes
And tears at why he might be
So much happiness he can also bring
When he smiles I smile
I feel content
Then the tears start to fall
When I remember
Who he is
I’m so confused
Which way to go.

Racquel